Thank you...baby..

When it comes to dealing with my disappointment or my sadness, I am totally worst case. For me is easier to just run away from my despair. It took me quite sometime to write this, but I know I would feel better after I wrote this down.

I just lost my baby recently, I don't want to remember when it is exactly. I was pregnant for 2, 5 months and I started to bleed heavily. My doctor advise me to abort it because the baby is not developing as it should be. Of course I know its for the best, but to get thru this new reality is undescribe-able. It's like all of a sudden something had been taken away.

For my baby, although you lived in my womb for only 2 months, I will remember you forever. I will remember the funny fuzzy feeling in my womb on those days, I will remember how happy we are with the news of your presence, I will remember how ur big brother Omar read a story for you every night before his bedtimes..most of all I will remember and love you as my baby..always.

I believe a person or people..no mater how quickly they had existed in my life, they had become a part of me. No matter how short time their presence colored my life, they left marks in my heart.I may never had a chance to say this to my baby, but I really want to say it out loud...for my baby, for my friend, best friends, girlfriends, boyfriends (ehm), everyone who had been coloring my life in the past..I only wanna say...Thank You for the memories..I will hold it dear in my heart..

Badly Need It...

After going through a very tough week, I feel the urge to read a good book ...a good novel that could warm my heart and lighten up my day. As I stepped out from the hospital today, the first place I wanna go is to my favorite bookstore, so I went there instead of going straight home. I stood very long in front of piles of bestseller's book. Sometimes I feel like those books invites me to touch them in their very own way. The last book that I've read was Candace Bushnell's one-fifth-avenue. But this time I just want to read a book by Cecilia Ahern. I read 3 of her books already and begin to feel like I am a new fan of her signatures.

The shopkeeper showed me several of Ahern's books. I have read PS I love you, Thank U 4 d memories and Love-Rosie, so he offered me the recent ones which are The book of tomorrow and the gift. I don't know why, I choose The book of tomorrow.

When I got home I started to read the book and as usual the first thing I read is the thank you notes that the author wrote to people who supported her and made it possible for her to finish the book. Why ? because I believe everyone source of inspirations always come from people who surrounds them.And you know what... the last thank you notes from her is dedicated to the booksellers, she wrote :
“The booksellers – for your incredible support. In The book of tomorrow I share my belief in the magic of books, how I believe books must contain some sort of homing device, which allows them to draw the correct reader to them. Books choose their readers, not the other way around. I believe that booksellers are the matchmakers. Thank You.”

You see I haven't finish reading her book yet, but you will understand as a bookseller am her big fan already.